bible study

it's funny how I can always tell when I'm drifting from God and when I'm right on track. my insecurities come back, i start doubting, i get scared, im hurt much more easily than usual.

it's sad how dumb we can be as believers sometimes. iv always been huge on praying and reading my bible and talking to God. especially living back at my moms, when things were so tough. i didnt go a day without my devotional time. but then, i moved out. and its not that life got easy or perfect, but i was through with some of the stress i had before. it was my wall i finally got rid of when i moved out. and along with the stress, i got rid of my bible study.

it wasnt intentional. i suddenly could do waht i wanted and i lost the time. i no longer felt i "needed it" bc the mom situation was over, but how ridiculous is that? i need it as much now as i did before, if not more. i have more free time, more freedom, which means more temptation. so why would i stop reading my bible now? i need my strength, i need my support, i need my motivation to do the right thing. yet, i just ditched Him. its been over a month and iv barely read my bible.

i guess i just find it funny how stupid we can be sometimes. one thing improves and we dont need His guidance? ridiculous.

so here i go, im gettin back in line. with everything. excercise, eating right, reading my bible, etc. i cant believe ifinally got what i thougth would help me improve so much, and i let it help me back track.