so recently at a conference we were told that we need to schedule a day to do nothing to "recharge" ourselves not only as leaders but as people. so i was thinking about that and bc of cancelled plans im pretty much doing that today anyway, yet im not feeling recharged at all. and the problem is that even though i have nothing i have to be doing, im stressing out about all these other people. some friends, some close relationships, some of my own students; i cant catch a break for one second. i wish it were possible to just stop caring. not permanently, but temporarily, even if it was for a short few hours, just to give myself a break. its exhausting to care about so many people.
this is a boundary issue, yes, and iv been working on it and still am working on it. but at the same time... is that all it is? people are constantly saying you cant give what you dont have. i think im giving way more than iv been receiving. the people i do receive it from do a great job doing that. is it bad to say tahts not always enough? maybe i need more than 2 people to love me, to truly deeply care about me and want whats best for me. how can i care for so many people when i only have 2 caring for me? is that wrong? does it not work like that? i really am not sure. all i do know is i need a break, and i need one bad. and taking this day to do nothing isnt the cure iv been looking for
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