good enough

here i am, attempting to throw together a 3 page biography about a composer i had never heard of before thats due tomorrow night.

what is WRONG with me??

i used to be an over-achiever. i would do work right away, projects weeks ahead of time. and now i wait until the last minute, usually turning in something that isnt even half of what i could really do. so why do i do it? excellent question.

some people worry that i am too focused on other things, like my internship, for example. well, im not giving up my homework/study time to do intern work. yes, i am at church 2 or 3 days a week. but 2 of those 3 days are weekend days, not week days, when i actually have homework.

goodness knows its not boys. i have to say iv done a pretty good job staying far away from that species.


im sitting here working and i hear some girls talking about a project they are working on. the girl is asking her friend if the page is acceptable. she kept asking "does it need details? is it eye catching?" finally the girl ends with "good enough" and went to go grab her project from the printer.

its ridiculous how much iv been saying "good enough". why am i ok with that? why am i ok with just meeting the bare minimum, when i know i can do so much more?

im sick of just being acceptable. im sick of doing things that are just "ok". im ready to step up and have everything i do be spectacular, superior, top notch. im sick of everything just being good enough. i dont want to be known for the student that was good enough, whos work was good enough, whos brain/acting/singing/personality was good enough. frankly i dont care what im known for at all. but the fact is, i was blessed with talents and intelligence. i was blessed with these thigns so i could use them to glorify God. thats what i live for, its who i am. here i am, ok with doing things that are just "good enough". i was created to be so much more than that.

so what do i do to change it? what do i do to improve when im not really sure whats holding me back in the first place?

hmm. i guess first step to that is obsessive amounts of prayer.

now back to my essay.